Did you hear about the constipated mathematician? He worked it out with a pencil.
Children are like farts. Your own are just about bearable, but everyone else’s are horrendous.
What’s the German word for constipation? Farfrompoopen.
Smell mop who?
No I will not smell your poo!
What did the prune say to his employees? “Let’s make this sh * t happen.”
What did the puma say to his friend who was making poop jokes? “Stop making me laugh or I’ll puma pants!”
Did you hear about the constipated accountant? He just could not budget.
Did you hear about the constipated movie? It never came out.
Did you hear about the sequel, Diarrhea? It leaked, so they had to release it early.
What do you get when you accidentally take a poop in your overalls? Dung-arees.
Poop jokes do not always get the potty started, but they sure do finish it.
I love my women like my diarrhea. I just can not hold it in.
What did the conditioner bottle do to the toilet seat? He shampooed it.
Why did the prankster put poo in the elevator? Because he wanted to take his pranks to the next level.
Which poop movie in a trilogy is the worst of all? The turd one.
What is a bathroom fairy called? Stinkerbell.
What did the patient say when he got admitted to the hospital for pooping too much? “I do not want to die-rrhoea.”
Who is it?
Hahaha, you said poo twice!
Who is it?
I did up.
I did up who?
Eww. You did a poo?
Why did Tigger stick his head in the toilet? He was looking for Pooh!
What type of poop jokes should you never crack? The corny ones.
What is a vegetarian suffering from diarrhea called? A salad shooter.
How can you unlock a toilet when you are in a hurry? With a doo-key.
What do flies politely say to the other? “Is this stool taken?”
When does Denzel Washington usually need to hang out with the Rugrats? On potty training day.